Well sadly it's not really good enough for reading... like anything harder than textbooks or childrens stories, especially without a dictionary, so I'm glad you summarized your points in English. =D
First of all it's really cool to hear opinions like this, 'cause I haven't really seem anything quite like it, especially from a woman. Even if I disagree with some of your opinions and ask questions please don't think I'm trying to say you can't be right or that you shouldn't think that way. I just like to debate these things. ^^
So do you think in general that being 'soft and/or feminine' is a bad quality to have, regardless of gender? Or is it only bad for men? Do you think women should still carry the soft motherly aspects if you are saying that men shouldn't? Do you want gender roles to go back to what they were, let's say in the 19th century? It seems that you are putting value in being soft (feminine) or tough (masculine) and soft comes out worse. This is interesting because many feminist theories attribute that for patriarchy and how if a man shows any signs that he is soft/feminine his worth as a man dwindle automatically. For men being feminine is always a bad thing, something that will make them fall in the hierarchy of men. When they aren't aspiring towards the ideal manliness or 'hegemonic masculinity' This is why men can't (for example) wear skirts or openly show affection (especially towards other men) by physical gestures (hugs kisses) or words. (there are of course exceptions to this rule, but in general you cannot show 'feminine qualities' without losing face among other men. (being called a fag might be the most common effect))
What kind of men's causes would you like there to be? Also I don't think we have many of those here (in Finland I mean) for women either. I can think of one and it's just a competition for women joggers... I think they might have something to do with breast cancer awareness or something. (but I might be wrong about this, I don't really follow that kind of news)
Also what kind of aid are you talking about here? I don't think we have any special help for female students in Finland and actually recently it's been in the news a lot that some boys are having difficulties in school and what could be done about this. Also people are kind of worried about how in higher education women are beginning to be the majority in some fields. Which I personally resent. Like why is it completely okay and normal for men to be the majority in practically anything but as soon as it seems like women are doing well in something and outstepping men that is automatically alarming and people start to question what is wrong with either education/men/society. Like it's so abnormal for women to be better at something than men. *grr* (and sorry I didn't mean to just start ranting)
And in a completely personal note at your last paragraph. I pretty much like the idea of gender roles being reversed... xD I'm all for the subjugation of men. ^_^;
But more seriously. I think the problem is that gender roles are so tightly defined and regulated. What I would like to see happen would be that you could just be an individual and act out your gender in the way that seems natural to you, without people saying that 'you aren't a proper man/woman for acting/doing that!' I don't like the idea that people couldn't do something just because people don't think it's appropriate for their gender.
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timeasmymeasure
Long reply is long
Date: 2011-02-19 01:03 pm (UTC)First of all it's really cool to hear opinions like this, 'cause I haven't really seem anything quite like it, especially from a woman. Even if I disagree with some of your opinions and ask questions please don't think I'm trying to say you can't be right or that you shouldn't think that way. I just like to debate these things. ^^
So do you think in general that being 'soft and/or feminine' is a bad quality to have, regardless of gender? Or is it only bad for men? Do you think women should still carry the soft motherly aspects if you are saying that men shouldn't? Do you want gender roles to go back to what they were, let's say in the 19th century?
It seems that you are putting value in being soft (feminine) or tough (masculine) and soft comes out worse. This is interesting because many feminist theories attribute that for patriarchy and how if a man shows any signs that he is soft/feminine his worth as a man dwindle automatically. For men being feminine is always a bad thing, something that will make them fall in the hierarchy of men. When they aren't aspiring towards the ideal manliness or 'hegemonic masculinity'
This is why men can't (for example) wear skirts or openly show affection (especially towards other men) by physical gestures (hugs kisses) or words. (there are of course exceptions to this rule, but in general you cannot show 'feminine qualities' without losing face among other men. (being called a fag might be the most common effect))
What kind of men's causes would you like there to be? Also I don't think we have many of those here (in Finland I mean) for women either. I can think of one and it's just a competition for women joggers... I think they might have something to do with breast cancer awareness or something. (but I might be wrong about this, I don't really follow that kind of news)
Also what kind of aid are you talking about here? I don't think we have any special help for female students in Finland and actually recently it's been in the news a lot that some boys are having difficulties in school and what could be done about this. Also people are kind of worried about how in higher education women are beginning to be the majority in some fields. Which I personally resent. Like why is it completely okay and normal for men to be the majority in practically anything but as soon as it seems like women are doing well in something and outstepping men that is automatically alarming and people start to question what is wrong with either education/men/society. Like it's so abnormal for women to be better at something than men. *grr* (and sorry I didn't mean to just start ranting)
And in a completely personal note at your last paragraph. I pretty much like the idea of gender roles being reversed... xD I'm all for the subjugation of men. ^_^;
But more seriously. I think the problem is that gender roles are so tightly defined and regulated. What I would like to see happen would be that you could just be an individual and act out your gender in the way that seems natural to you, without people saying that 'you aren't a proper man/woman for acting/doing that!' I don't like the idea that people couldn't do something just because people don't think it's appropriate for their gender.